The Conversation They Never Had

A Short Story

“…..know what to do if they actually do publish it .Wow!! That would be too vicious huh what do you think his reaction will be when he knows how old I am”

“Just shut up. Ok! Shut up.” She said heatedly. “I can’t stand your non sense any more you’re so fuckin’ dramatic. Everything that happens to you is a major event in the course of time. When you write and it gets published, the world is too stupid to understand how deep you are. 

When you write and it doesn’t get published the world is too ignorant and God forbid when you don’t write at all the people of our poor world don’t know what the fuck they’re missing. 

When did everything become about you? When did the world stop and revolved around Mr. Omar Saleh Zakaria huh? Just tell me that much bitch!”

She stopped to catch her breath and also because she was just too angry to be articulate any more. She knew exactly what he was going to say; he was going to comment only on her last sentence and ignore everything else. 

He was either going to say “I know.” or “I know you told me before.”

“I know you told me before.” He said with a smile only she could hear.

BBC World Service...Weeks 3 & 4

The last two weeks at World Update were just as exciting as the first two. I met some very interesting people and was given more responsibilities to handle stories all on my own. I was very please when the editor gave me the Liverpool story to handle. Liverpool was bought by two American businessmen and we needed to speak to a sports business expert to say why Americans are now interested in British football and also to say what impacts that will have on the traditions of the club.

We also had to speak to fans and see what they thought about the whole issue. I stressed out in the beginning because the story was out of my comfort zone but was really glad when I pulled it off with the help of the producers on the program. It was good to feel that I wasn't only working on Middle East stories.

I also met Martin Fletcher a journalist at the Times who was recently in Iraq (Ghazaliya) to be specific. In his article he compared the Ghazaliya he had last seen in 2003, a nice green suburb, to the Ghazaliya he saw when he went a month ago, a battered unrecognizable slum. I called him to see if he would come on the show for a live interview to describe in more detail what he saw.

He did agree to the interview and was live with Dan Damon that morning. I showed him out of the building afterwards and had a nice talk. I wasn't really sure what was more exciting for me; chatting to a prominent journalist from The Times or chatting to someone who's just been to Iraq and back.

He was talking about how frustrated American troops really are and about pools of sewage and piles of trash and poor Iraqis with no schools or medical support.

We also had a chat about the changing face of journalism and how he thought print journalism will always exist even if took different forms. He was leaving for Romania that day so I hope he had a good stay and some good stories.

The other really interesting person I met was Brad Meltzer, an American writer who spent a week with George Bush senior who told him what it felt like to be a president one day and have to stop at red signals like everyone else the next day.

One heart breaking story Bush senior shared with Meltzer was that of him giving a final presser in his home lawn and when the media left he realized that he had to clear the coffee cups himself because there was no one to do it that for him anymore. He also spent a day with Bill Clinton who shared what life has been like for him after the presidency.

Meltzer's latest Thriller "The Book of Fate" is about a former president facing that power vacuum. We had a brief chat on his way out in which he declared that coming from Florida he'll probably never get used to English weather.

He also said that despite his politics that are not quiet pro-Bush to say the least , he really did like Bush senior as a person (well … an eighty something person) when he spent time with him.

The BBC World Service...Feels Just Like Home

I've been really bad with blogging my work placement...I finally decided that if I don't blog now, I would just go into my last week without blogging at all...The problem is thatI spend my weekends getting over my weekdays' hours!! Everyday of the weekend I promise myself to blog while everything is fresh in my head, but my body seems set on catching up on lost sleep...Anyway here goes.

I guess before I talk about how my work placement is going, I have to say how lucky I feel to have gotten the World Service. I realized that even more when I started the actual work. The news agenda just makes so much sense to me. I guess coming from my background makes the BBC World Service a natural choice. BBC's Radio1,Radio2 , Radio 4 and Radio Five Live (I mention those because these are the ones I usually listen to, not that other stations and local radio is not good too) are all world class but highly domestic and, for someone who has moved here only 8 months ago, I do feel like a stranger when I listen sometimes.But with BBC World Service I feel right at home as far as the news agenda is concerned.

World Update is a news and current affairs program on the World Service and airs at 10:00am GMT and 05:00 am on the U.S.A's East Coast. Itis very interesting because of the wide range of stories you can run. Stories vary from really hard news to really interesting and fun stories.

Barzan's Head!
It is really hard to believe how much I got to do in the three weeks I've been in World Update. But I still think my first day was very exceptional.That Monday was the day of Barzan Al Tikriti's (Saddam Hussein's half brother) and Awad Al Bandar's execution. When we went in they had already been hanged and of course that was going to be our lead...I worked with one of the producers on the story and was asked to find contacts to Iraq to have someone speak about the executions. To make a long story (and a large number of phone calls) short...I ended up with Ja'afar Al Musawi's number! He is the chief prosecutor in Saddam's Dujail trial.

I actually didn't realize how surreal all of this was until I found myself in a studio interviewing him on the phone and him giving me graphic discriptions of Barzan's head coming off his body and how tight security was during the executions! being caught in the moment I challenged him a bit about the head thing and asked what he would sayto speculations that this was a mistake and that the execution did not go down as smoothly as they claimed. He was then quick to reply " it was not a mistake it was the will of Allah" a clip the producer of the story really liked.

I mean really!!! Here I was talking to someone I'd seen the night before on Al Jazeera and Al Arabiya speaking to me about something I could've only heard him say on some program on the BBC World Service...Oh, wait a minute that IS where I was was!!!I then had to translate the clips we were going to use for them to be voiced. The clips worked well and some were also used in another program called News Hour.

Egypt's Nuclear Program
The first week also saw me working on the Egyptian Nuclear program story (one that I actually pitched). I spoke to a number of Egyptian politicians and nuclear experts and was discussing the implications of a nuclear program in Egypt and whether it could one day be used for military purposes and also what it meant to Gamal Mubarak's political profile as a potential successor to his father.

I still had to pinch myself that I got to do a story like that on a program like World Update. I got alot of support from the Editor and the team and was shown how to contatct the BBC studios in Cairo to book them for our guest. And how to write a full brief with my idea, the guest details and suggested questions.

The rest of the week and the week to follow I made numerous contacts with Baghdad.I honestly have never felt closer to Iraq in my life. I also chased a story in Liberia about the first all female military contingent there and was trying to get an interview with the commander in chief which in turn meant numerous contacts with the United Nations envoy there, who was really cooperative and made the interview happen.

Greek Treasures
Another interesting day was chasing the Greek Minister of Culture to speak about Greece's anger over an auction in the UK on Greek Royalty items. I didn't get the minister but managed to get the cultural attache in London who turned out to be a great speaker and was very fired up about the issue!

All For Peace
One of my favorite stories was All For Peace Radio. This was about a radio station based in Jerusalem where Palestinians and Israelis work together. The station divides its 24 hours evenly between Arabic and Hebrew transmission. It's morning program "Sabah El Khier" (Good Morning) attratcs a huge audience on both sides of the conflict msinly becaus eit features both sides of the conflict. It normally hosts Arab and Jewish guests discussing a crtain issue and gives them both a chance to reveal their side of the story.

I spoke to the program's presenter Ziad Darwish to fix an interview and in the course of our conversation he said to me that inspite of being a "proud Palestinian" as he put it, he was a commited and professional journalist who was determined to project both sides of the Arab-Israeli conflict.At one point I was speaking to one of the Israeli directors in the station asking him for a certain clip and I sensed the interesting dynamics of this exceptional radio station.

More Stories

I also had to get an interview with the Irish minister of Enterprise about green cards being introduced in Ireland. It wasn't easy but I finally got through.. What else? Oh yes, I made contact with the governor of Najaf and asked him about the attacks on militants last weekend and how they affected Ashouraa' celebrations in the Shi'ite city.

I chased a Nigerian politician for a whole day to get him to respond to a Human Rights Watch report about how education and health are on the verge of collapsing in one of Nigeria's wealthiest states.It was really difficult but we got the response in the end.

I could go on and on about what I learned and what I've been given the oppurtunity to do in World Update.However, all I can really say is that I went in expecting to be treated like the work experience kid and instead I was given a chance to contribute ideas and follow up stories. I got alot of help and support from a team of extremely professional journalists. I was trusted and was given responsibilities which made me feel useful and productive.

I really need to get going... I have to get up in four hours to start my journey to Bush House.

Eid Mubarak...Did you see Saddam's Video?!

Something shook me to the bones when I saw saddam's hanging and that picture of him dead in a white shroud.

Sure we can all say Saddam deserves to die, Saddam deserves to pay for what he's done, but when it actually happens infront of our very own eyes the chilling effect is undeniable.

He was such a powerful figure and seeing him in the state he was made me really sad. I know what Saddam did during his time in office. I know the lives he ended and those he ruined forever and I have no sympathy for the man but as I watched that video these questions ran through my mind...

• How will hanging Saddam undo the crimes committed against Shiites in Dujail?
• How will hanging Saddam answer for chemical weapons against the Kurds, mass graves everywhere in Iraq or the invasion of Kuwait and the war in Iran?
• Why is this sold to the Iraqis and indeed to the whole world as a triumph for those who lived the horrors of Saddam's regime when those people had absolutely no say in ending that regime?
• Most importantly, how will hanging Saddam stop the everyday sectarian violence in Iraq?
  

What angered me the most was how most of the media tried to stage the reaction of the world as two camps for and against the death sentence and how some Iraqis ,the Shiites and the Kurds to be specific, were elated and some of Saddam's supporters were mourning.

It is true the reactions varied some celebrated and others vowed revenge but to put the story in those two black and white pigeonholes is an insultingly simplistic way to handle it. If nothing it is because this false victory that some Iraqis celebrate was only allowed by the very people responsible for the destruction and division of their country.

With all the studio guests and phono's… with all the party leaders and political analysts why couldn't anybody highlight the fact that this execution led by a farce trial was entirely an American agenda. That George Bush wanted to look macho after the big blow in mid-term elections in a bid to win a cheap point with the American popularity polls.

Why couldn't anyone get Nouri Al Maliki ,or any other politician for that matter, to answer why he couldn't postpone the execution as he wanted to, or about the legitimacy of the trial and the execution that were done in a court of an occupied and currently un-sovereign country. And if the country is indeed sovereign, why was it left to the Americans to decide that the execution happens on the first day of Eid Al Adha , in a blatant disregard and disrespect to one of the holiest days on the Muslim calendar.

Translation!

"Today Saddam Hussein was executed after receiving a fair trial - the kind of justice he denied the victims of his brutal regime." US President George W Bush

Translation: Today I got back at Saddam Hussein. That son of a bitch who tried to kill my father. He was executed after a trial we staged making it look as if an Iraqi judicial system really exists-This is the kind of justice we allowed him to deny the victims of his brutal regime …a regime we supported in the past when he helped us kick Iran's ass.

"I welcome the fact that Saddam Hussein has been tried by an Iraqi court for at least some of the appalling crimes he committed against the Iraqi people. He has now been held to account. The British government does not support the use of the death penalty, in Iraq or anywhere else." UK Foreign Secretary Margaret Beckett

Translation: I welcome the fact that we are finally rid of that bastard. He has been tried for some of the appalling crimes we watched him do over the years and chose to do nothing about it. The British government does not support the death penalty but can do nothing about it in Iraq or anywhere else.

Veronica Guerin ...Was It Worth Losing a Life?

In our first journalism theory lecture,Chris Horrie showed us a short film about journalists who were killed while doing their job.

Veronica Guerin's story kept haunting me ever since I saw that presentation. I was drawn to her story for all the obvious reasons of course; she was a very strong willed woman ,braver than alot of men I know,really good at her job mainly because she loved it.

I've just finished the film made about her that carries her name and must say it is going to be hard to get over it...her actually...My husband looked at me recognizing my sorrow for Guerin's death and my great admiration for her. He then asked me, "do you want to be like her?" "is it worth losing your life? losing your kids maybe?" I said I didn't really know...Then I said "No...No it's not"

I think what affected me the most was that phone call she got from one of the drug barons telling her that if she writes anything about him he was going to kidnap her son,rape him and then shoot her. She eventually died for her cause and things have changed for the better as far as the war on drug dealers was concerned.She is now a saint,a hero. A dead hero.

At the end of the day there's a son who will never have his mom back, a husband that lost his wife and a woman who put herself and her loved ones in danger to eventually be brutally murdered.

I stand humble infront of that woman's courage and infront of the courage of many journalists who were arrested,detained,tortured,terrorised or killed in the pursuit of truth.

Yet,as an aspiring journalist I have to take a second to ask myself ; is it all worth it? How many awful things in the world have really changed at the cost of the lives of those trying to change them? How far will I honestly allow myself to go? How brave am I really? If I'm not willing to put myself in danger for the job,am I not commited enough? What right do I have to put my family into any kind of danger?

This is not a defeated mentality, marginally sceptic yes. But mostly, realistic.

I am ambitious. I want to be a good journalist. I want to write great stories and reveal truths. I want to question. I want to change the world.I want to live to see it change.